I Resolve!

First Published February 3, 2010

A friend of mine recently reminded me of my zeal for New Year’s resolutions. I think the word reminded might be a bit generous—mocked, scoffed, and laughed hysterically would be more accurate.

A few years ago I joined a group of my friends for lunch, to spend some time discussing our goals for the coming year. We talked and ate, then finally settled in for the purpose of the get- together. I retrieved my tote and pulled out my handy-dandy portfolio, complete with my ledger pad and color-coordinated pen. I waited for everyone else to do the same, but no one moved.

One by one, each friend began listing her goals. Some were straightforward things like wanting to read the Bible more. Others included wanting to show more patience with children, and the ever elusive, yet always present goal of losing weight. Target dates were given by which time the goals were to be accomplished.

This is good, I smiled. Now we’ll get into the nuts and bolts of each one. With my ledger pad in hand, I waited for the cue to begin. My friend looked at me and said, “That’s a mighty big notepad you’ve got there, Pam. What’s it for?”

I looked incredulous. “What's it for? My goals, of course! My hopes. My dreams. My aspirations. Everything that this year could possibly contain is listed in beautiful headings, subheadings, points and subpoints. Where should I begin?”

Everyone at the table now had what I could only describe as severe smirks on their faces. What did I say? I pondered. Surely, they have something similar. I was wrong. Very wrong. Where my friends said things like, “I would like to keep a cleaner house,” I had articulated in great detail what exactly that meant. It looked something like this:

Fully Organized and Beautifully Functional Home that Glistens 
and Glossens Every Moment of the Day

living room
fluffy, soft, perfect carpet
vacuum every other day
cleaned professionally twice a year
Sparkling Furniture
dust every other day
polish once a week
tasteful Decos
keep dusted every other day
rotate items seasonally
dispose of any unnecessary clutter

I could list more, but you get the idea. I had pages of these little beauties. As I read them, the smirks turned to mouths dropped open, to full-bellied laughter, to head-shaking, then back to laughing so hard, one friend had to excuse herself to go to the bathroom.

Was I really that much over the top? I've come to discover that most of the time I am. So the million-dollar question is: “How did the rest of the year go with such lofty ideals?” Some goals were met, but I believe the “lose weight” category may be on the recurring list for years to come.

This year, I’m stepping back a bit and praying for general areas of my life, asking God to lead me day by day. Lists aren’t bad as long as I don’t become a slave to them and allow them to rob me of the joy and purpose that God has for my life in that particular moment. Still, I can’t help but look longingly at my big yellow notepad and sigh.

7 Tips for Setting Goals

1. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. Set small goals that are manageable.
2. Talk with a friend or two and see if your goals seem realistic to them. Ask them to provide additional insight.
3. Stagger the start date for some of your goals. Begin some in January, and leave others till summer or fall.
4. Prioritize what is truly important.
5. Plan fun goals as well. This is your life. Make the most of it.
6. Pray and ask the Lord to help you understand His leading.

7. After you write your goals, spend a week praying over them and then move forward.