Guide to Taxi Honks--Abridged Edition

First published February 3, 2009

Beep beep
Do you want a ride?

Beep
Hey, car on my right, I'm over here!

Beep
Hey, car on my left, I'm over here!

Beep
I'm merging into your lane and by the time you hear my horn I will already be there.

Beep
Get out of my way donkey cart.

Beep
Get out of my way (basket/bread/banana) seller.

Beep
Get out of my way pizza delivery moped.

Beep
Get out of my way darting pedestrians.

Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep
Get out of my way because I'm not braking!

Staccato Beep
Sorry to cut you off.

Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep! Beep! B-B-B-Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeep! 
You are blocking the whole intersection!

Beep! Wooooooo! Wooooooooo! Wooooooo!
I am clever. I have a horn that sounds like an ambulance so people move out of my way quicker.

Beep! (10 seconds) Beep! (10 seconds) Beep!
I have Horn Tourettes. I honk for no reason because I'm in such a habit of doing it.

Beep with hands thrown up in the air.
Crazy woman driver!

Beeeeeeeeeeeeep! Bang hands on steering wheel and mutter words under your breath...
I am having to drive these Americans across town in the busiest part of the day to a mall that I couldn't even begin to shop at and now I'm stuck in the middle of this mess and they probably won't even give me a decent tip so I'm going to play terrible acapella Arabic music really loud as a way to make you pay!